Satirical News Release For IT…Yes We Have a Sense of Humor
FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE – Our company, the leader in world-changing technology, is about to debut a revolutionary new open source-based solution that will change the IT marketplace paradigm forever. We expect wide acceptance among businesses ranging from Global 1000 companies to work-at-home network marketers, not to mention millions of individual computer users.
Our management team has over 100 years of collective experience developing innovative products and bringing them to market.
“Think of the way agriculture made civilization possible, and you’ll have some idea of the effect we believe our new offering will have on the way people work with computers and the Internet,” says our senior assistant vice president of marketing, who holds a Ph.D in holistic studies from the University of Leading-Edge Advancement.
Our state-of-the-art licensing program allows OEMs worldwide to leverage our exclusive, patent-pending proprietary developments in their own software stack, creating an unparalleled synergy for repurposing mission-critical deployments. We are firm believers in open source, so we have taken the unique step of protecting the open source software that is the heart of our product by patenting it so competitors can’t use it to make inferior versions.
About our company
We are backed by a group of multinational venture capital firms. Our founders are dedicated to their vision of a world in which corporations do no evil. We recently closed a second round of funding we are using to keep the excitement going as we prepare for our IPO, which will be handled by the world’s premier investment bank. Our directors’ expertise spans industries ranging from novelty item wholesaling to personal vehicle retail marketing. We are positioned to rapidly open facilities in major cities worldwide to accommodate the inevitable demand for our breakthrough creation.
For more information, contact media@meshout.com